Tuesday, May 25, 2010

5 Tips on How to Survive a Breakup and Get Off the Depression Express


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How to survive a breakup is a life lesson that you can't learn from a book. You've tried all the ways you can to stay together, and have made the decision that it's over. Now you need to function on a daily basis while dealing with the feeling that your entire life has been derailed. You feel betrayed and angry and hurt, and this is how it should be. Grief and loss enters everyone's life at some point; the trick is how you handle it. Here are five simple tips to help you get your emotional roller coaster back on the right track.

1. Out of Sight, Out of Mind

To get through a your breakup, the keepsakes have to go. The tickets to the ballgame where you first met?....Out. The cute anniversary card you put up on the put up on the fireplace? Put it IN the fireplace. Get rid of anything that reminds you of your ex. You may choose to burn these items, or just store them somewhere out of sight. Either way will work as long as all the visual cues of your relationship, and of the breakup, are gone.

2. A Friend In Need Is A Friend Indeed

You are not alone. Your friends are your best source of moral support and emotional steadiness in these dark days of depression. So break out of the "poor me" rut and rely on your friends. Let them help get your mind off of the breakup. Perhaps you should invite them over for a "Keepsake Removal Party." (See tip 1, above.) Lighten the mood and take a step toward recovery at the same time.

3. Make Some Elbow Room

You want to survive this breakup. Given that fact, you need to create some distance between you and your ex. You need your own space just now, free from any outside influences. To start with, all communication with your ex must be cut off. This will help you to mentally remove them from your life. Don't talk to them, don't text them. Cut off means exactly that. No emails, no tweets, no Facebook or other social media. The longer you resist breaking contact with them, the harder the entire process will be. Keep in mind that the only way to move on is by going forward.

4. Give Yourself Time

Everyone reacts to grief and loss differently. Some cling to those feelings and drag them out for as long as possible. Others will seemingly be over their mourning in a day. You are the best judge of how long the process takes, for you. So give yourself ample time to cope with the emotions that arise during your breakup. Don't ignore these emotions, but don't give them control either. You want to accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative in your situation.

5. Get Busy

Go ahead and take a little time to be alone, but don't overdo it. You can't hide from the world, it will still be there tomorrow. So get out of the house at every opportunity. It's a good idea to avoid the old haunts you used to frequent with your ex. Develop some new haunts. Rediscover the things life has to offer. Participate in positive activities to give your mind and emotions a break. Go skydiving. Or if that is a little too much of a break for you, clean the house or go to the gym, or anything else that requires some level of activity and involvement. You've been wanting to make enough room to actually put the car in the garage, now would be a really good time.

So, there is. How to survive a breakup in just a few short paragraphs. Get the reminders out of sight, call on your friends, make some elbow room, give yourself time, and get busy. The sooner you smooth out your emotional ups and downs the quicker you will get over your breakup.

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